Diaper Box Go Kart

I know the above pic is hard to see but let's explain.
Yesterday, I took a break at work to quick come home and feed Sasha. When I walked in the door, I saw Dad & Sasha were having much fun with the cardboard box that bulk diapers came in! Sasha was sitting in the diaper box like it was a go-kart, and Dad was wheeling her up and down the hallway. She was just looking around so matter of fact. It's one of those images that will hopefully stay in my mind. I did try to take a picture of it with my camera phone but there was not enough lighting for the camera (no it wasn't dark). She wasn't smiling, wasn't frowning. She just had this look on her face like all was exactly how it should be, that of course Dad was supposed to be pushing her up and down the hall in a diaper box.

Standing like a big girl

And sticking her tongue out at mommy. She's been sticking her tongue out a lot lately. I find it very endearing.

Grow Baby Brains Grow!

Sasha is back on a night shift schedule with me. She's been back to cosleeping with me again for a week now and I'm actually getting 8-hour sleep days again! I missed her so much. I think the best thing about co-sleeping with her is the feeling that I get an extra 8 hours a day with her. It makes up for the hours I lost by working full time. (In comparison with my older daughter. It felt like she was raised by babysitters, which was so depressing.)

Again I feel as though the baby I have today has grown leaps and bounds from the baby she was last week. She seems to be undergoing a rapid burst of brain development.

Today, Sasha played peek-a-boo with us and it was much fun. We've done peek-a-boo plenty of times with her before but it just didn't seem to sink in. She would usually just stare at the spot she last saw us at and wait for us to reappear. Today, I could see the gears turning in her head and the "A-Ha!" moment as she grabbed the blanket off my head if I didn't take it off fast enough. She officially understands object permanence!
She's been sticking her tongue out at me. She's been practicing her B's and P-sounds. She keeps trying to make the mouth-popping sound like Cassie makes. She copies some of the noises we make at her.
Jon says that tonight she crawled herself into her green bouncy chair several times. When he helped to position her after she crawled in, she pulled the center flap up, then grabbed the connector tabs and tried to put them in. She was very excitable and wouldn't eat much. "she got me real good a bit ago," Jon said. "Forearm across my throat, flat on my back, with her drooling and yelling directly in my ear.. while I was trapped between the couch/Ikea chair/green chair/TV stand. She was going for the 'kill' .. two killer rabbit teeth to my ear."
The biggest tell that she is really going through some rapid brain development is the sudden need for extra sleep. It's like she learns something new, gets sleepy, and has to go to sleep to process all this new information. She is almost newborn-like with her need for naps yesterday and today.

In the gross motor skill department, I am undecided whether she is going to walk first or crawl. She is close to being able to crawl..but she is also just beginning to start "cruising"...the term for when babies walk around by holding on to tables, chairs, etc. We still take her for many walks around the house each day by letting her hang on to our hands. She loves doing that. Anyways, there was one incident this weekend where Sasha was standing and holding onto the living room chair. Jon walked past her and she stared after him. Well she decided she wanted to follow him so she carefully balanced herself, let go of the chair with one hand, and tried to take a step away. She really was going to try to walk after him but I stepped in and grabbed her little hand. I wonder how she would have done if I didn't interfere. Most likely she would have fallen on her little butt, which really pisses her off. And we don't want that, but sometimes I have to remember to sit back and let her learn.

Baby Carriers

Alright, I've been meaning to get these on here and here goes. (OK I don't know if it's my monitor or what but the pics look fine on flickr and blurry on blogger. Weird. Oh well, they can be clicked on to view full size and they're not blurry that way.)
The baby carrier kit 14-day loan is completed and I had to return the kit on Tuesday. I declared the Moby Wrap my winner. I sent this green Moby wrap back and ordered a black one. I should get it in the mail in 3-4 days.
Sasha gets excited the moment she sees me with the moby wrap. She loves it when I tickle her with the ends of it as I start to tie it on myself. But once she's in it, she gets this strange calm and just zones out. She is very comfortable in it with me, and I am comfortable carrying her in it.

I could wear her in it for days and I think Sasha is equally enthusiastic. I haven't had the nerve to try the 'back carry' with it yet. I did try forward facing (Sasha goes right to sleep that way) and also in the 'nursing carry' (Sasha nurses in it and goes to sleep).
Cassie remarked that we seem like one person stuck together when she is in it. I also got a lot of remarks and comments when we were out like this in stores.

We also tried the mei tei carrier. I didn't mind it but Sasha and I didn't have that "two people as one" connection in it. She sort of just flopped around and she squirmed a lot in it. First pic is the 'Hip carry'...hard to see from the camera angle.

Mei tei trial, front carry. The mei tei was reversable- either solid olive green, or the pink with green polka dots side could face outward too.

Mei Tei back carry. I loved that the back carry was so easy to set up. I could get some housework done without Sasha grabbing everything I was trying to clean. Eventually though, Sasha seemed to be uncomfortable in it.

The last mei tei back carry pic illustrates how after a while, Sasha started squirming to get out of it. Note how she now has both of her arms off to the same side...because she was trying to climb out of it.

Steak-N-Shake Baby

Sasha hams it up and destroys a cracker at the local Steak-n-Shake. She is such fun to take out.

Happy Dancing Baby Girl

Cassie had her orchestra spring recital at school tonight and it was pretty neat. Cassie has been proudly practicing her bass for us over the past few months and even gave Sasha a special "show" once, which Sasha thoroughly enjoyed. So tonight I took the girls to Cassie's concert. It was just me, Cassie, and Sasha.
Sasha was so well behaved! I couldn't believe how good she was. And she was in a lively good mood as well. She danced to every song. She smiled at almost every stranger in the nearby audience and the woman next to me even took her picture.

Sasha especially loved the chorus' performance. Is it wrong of me to say that although the chorus performed magnitudes better than their Christmas performance, they didn't really sound very good. (I'm being nice when I say that.) It makes me wonder...when I was in 7th and 8th grade, did our school chorus sound so bad? Oh man I'm going to get hit by lightning now aren't I? How dare I criticise a 7th and 8th grade chorus performance. So what if the boy's voices were in the middle of their changes and most of them sounded tone deaf. But I must say they were very lively and they chose some modern songs which definitely had their enthusiasm. And hey, Sasha loved it. She clapped and danced in my lap and squeaked and seemed to try to sing along. She didn't care if they were out of tune. It gave her a chance to practice her fun new skill: applauding. Her face just lit up everytime it was time to clap at the end of each number.

Cassie did well. The bass and cello sections sounded good. Cassie was the only 7th grade bass player. There were a few violins and violas that sounded very very screechy and off key. Cassie said she was disappointed by the violas. For her favorite song, she expressed exasperation. She practiced it so hard to have the 'violas ruin it'. She mentioned that maybe next year she'd like to try band...sure they didn't have the violas or crackling voices, but when a horn hits a bad note, everyone knows it.
Well don't I feel absolutely low for criticising a 7th and 8th grade band/orchestra/chorus recital. I did enjoy seeing my daughter play and it was a great experience for the little one. I had a good time.

Watch her grow

It seems like my baby has grown so much the past week or two that she doesn't even seem like the same baby she was last week. Her core personality is there, but more of it is revealed each day as she learns new abilities. I can't wait to see who this little person is going to be!

Mama's Girl
She's a mama's girl this week. She and I really have a good connection. We play together and have a lot of fun. I can read her every glance and expression and she is so communicative. She started saying "MAMA". At first it seemed so random but she's saying it more and with more intent. She's almost starting to seem like she understands that I am Mama.

Dada
Unfortunately, it seems like either Jon or I have a good connection to Sasha at any given time. So often, Sasha was a Daddy's girl. They could read each other, had their own special routines and games they played. And I was the odd parent out. But now the past two weeks or so, it seems to have shifted. As my connection to Sasha grows, their connection seems to be waning. I think I'd almost prefer that if Sasha can't be in tune with both of us at the same time, then I'd rather she be closer to Jon than to me. He's the one that has to stay with her all night while I'm at work.
But I don't want to just stop playing with her! I've been having so much fun with her! So he'll just have to step it up if he's going to get her favor back :)
I think we are both going to have to get used to the fact that she will probably bounce back and forth between us...that some times she'll love us both equally. But sometimes, she just might favor one of us over the other. And when that happens, we have to learn not to take it personal. She'll always come back to both of us eventually.

Assisted Walking
She loves her new-found favorite past-time of assisted walking. I hold her little hands and let her explore the house as she walks around. I let her turn her head to steer in the direction she wants to go, and I watch her gaze to see what captures her rapt attention. She walks around and explores everything. Bags of diapers, doors, Cassie's room, mirrors, carpet lint, and everything she happens to walk past. It is almost like a preview of the toddler she will become, when she will walk around the house and get into everything.
I still can't get over how well she is sitting. It seemed like it happened over night. One day, I would sit her up and if I wasn't holding her or propping her up she would topple over. Then the next day, she was sitting on her own for hours with no assistance at all! What gets me is she looks like such a big girl sitting there on her own, playing with her toys.

Separation Anxiety
This is the beginning of separation anxiety. If she sees me leave the house, she gets mad! Today, she watched me leave for work and threw a two hour temper tantrum. I eventually had to leave work to go home and calm her down. (Fortunately I live a block away from work, and they are fine with me running home to nurse her when I need to.) This gave my poor husband a headache and I think it hurt his feelings a little. He had to listen to her cry for the whole two hours, and none of his usual Daddy-tricks worked to calm her down.

Working on that Sleep Schedule
We decided to try to work on Sasha's sleep schedule. Specifically, we want her back on a night shift schedule with me. It was so much easier on the whole household when she was cosleeping with me during the day. We all got sleep. And well rested parents are good for kids :)
So far, we've almost got her migrated. I'd say we're half-way there. Instead of sleeping most of the time I'm at work, she's sleeping half of it. I can imagine how hard it must be for my husband to have to try to keep her awake all night so that she will be ready to sleep during the day. I know it can't be easy.

Angle the spoon

I discovered a strange trick to feeding my baby girl. And it's so strange, because after I discovered it, I realized that I had long ago found the same to be true with my first daughter 12 years ago. If there wasn't such a long age gap between my girls, I might have actually remembered the trick and wouldn't have had to reinvent the wheel.
I had been having troubles feeding Sasha. When I offered a spoon full of food, she would clamp her mouth shut and shake her head back and forth. I figured she just wasn't taking to solids after that two week gap where we stopped feeding her everything but breastmilk. I was afraid she had forgotten how to eat.
Of course, she still loved to play with her spoon, and if I put some food on her spoon, I had a 10 percent chance of her feeding it to herself before she splattered it everywhere. That gave me the epiphany: she didn't like it when I offered her a spoonful of food straight on. I tried to offer her a spoon of food at an angle off to her right side and her mouth opened up like a baby birdy.
So if I offer her food head-on/straight-on, she will close her mouth as tight as Fort Knox. But a spoon offered at an angle to her right side makes her readily gobble her food down.
This is so strange. Now she eats great!

Fussy baby

Sasha has been a little more crabby than usual lately. I wish she could tell me what is troubling her. I'm trying to guess if she is teething or if she has a stomach upset or maybe her bowels are troubling her. We've noticed the last few weeks that Sasha goes from happy camper to screaming rabid baby in a moments notice when she gets hungry, which seems so strange to me. Like how can you suddenly get instantly hungry? In the past, when she suddenly started crying, hunger was the last thing I'd guess because hunger is normally one of those things that slowly creeps up on you. Oh well, just one of those curious things. It just seems so weird to see a baby go from giggling happy playing to "FEED ME NOW MINION! I AM HUNGRY," in two seconds flat.

We've been playing with the moby wrap some more and Sasha and I both like it a lot. Yesterday, Sasha became unconsolably fussy. All our usual tricks were not working. I put on the Moby Wrap and snuggled her in it facing me, and she instantly calmed down. I found that sort of strange, as I had been carrying her around and that didn't calm her down any. I didn't see much difference in carrying her around snuggled close to me, or carrying her around wrapped in the moby wrap snuggled close. But it did make a difference so I guess I'm going to have to think about getting one.

I feel bad that something is bothering Sasha and I can't fix it. I can tell that she is in some sort of discomfort. She can sometimes be distracted from whatever is bothering her. For now, I try to keep her mentally distracted with play. Sometimes that's enough to take her mind off of whatver is bugging her. And I try not to get frustrated when it's not enough.

It's like christmas!

The Happy Baby website has a baby carrier loan program that I decided to try out. I am so glad I did! The way the program works is they mail you four types of baby carriers, which you can use and test out for 14 days, then you mail them back. There are so many different types of carriers out there, and you never know which type will agree with you until you try it out. But they are so costly to just outright buy them to try them out so I love the idea of the loan program.
I already have a baby bjorn and a snugli. The snugli carrier was terrible; it felt like I was hanging the baby around my neck on a necklace. All of the weight of the baby was pulling my neck down. The baby bjorn was much better but now that Sasha is getting bigger I'm starting to fatigue easier. The other problem I have with the bjorn is that I am short with short arms. I had always thought that I could run around the house and clean with Sasha in the baby carrier. Hard to explain but for example: if I want to do dishes while wearing Sasha, I can't reach the dishwater without her back hitting the sink. So I would really like to find something that distributes her weight more, that will allow me multiple carry methods (to do housework), and something that can grow with her.
I received a package today with four types of baby carriers and tested them out on a very willing Sasha. There was a ring sling, a mei tei, a pouch style carrier, and a moby wrap (long piece of fabric that you tie).
I just could not get the hang of the ring sling. It was too hard for me to adjust and Sasha seemed like she was just going to flop right out. So that was a no-go right away.
I tried the pouch carrier next, and although I think I have the wrong size (too small), it seemed okay. I could only use the hip carry but Sasha seemed to love it and Cassie remarked that Sasha seemed comfortable in it. But I could only use one hand while holding Sasha in the hip carry and the pouch was too small for me to try any other carry in it. Perhaps if I had the right size I could test it out properly.
I tried to figure out the mei tei and I lost my patience with it. It looks like it could carry Sasha on my back pretty easily, which would be neat if I could figure it out. It also looks like it folds up nice and small so it would fit in our diaper bag easily. I like that. Honestly, I need to retry it when I have more patience and maybe some better instructions.
Lastly, I tried the Moby wrap, and that worked so well! Sasha was so snug and comfortable. I tested out the nursing position, and she nursed herself to sleep right away. Our testing stopped for little bit while she slept. Moving about the house did not wake her. It looked like Sasha and I were both very comfortable with it. When she woke we tried some other moby wrap positions. I took her for a walk to the local 7eleven and Sasha's weight was so well distributed that it didn't feel like I was carrying any additional weight. I could easily carry Sasha around all day with no fatigue if she wanted. I have not been able to try the back carry. The back carry with this carrier type does require the assistance of someone else to get the baby tied in properly.
Anyways, I am very happy with the Moby wrap. I had such fun trying out the different carrier types. It felt like Christmas. Sasha seemed to enjoy also. She was very content in the pouch and moby wrap and she didn't mind the other carriers either. She's such a mellow baby.
I get to play with the carriers for 14 days. It should be fun.

She blew up!

Sasha has been making up for those 7 days of empty diapers, which we knew she would. Unfortunately, we had an incident that was quite upsetting for both me and Sasha.
We went to Red Robin for dinner. We forgot to bring the bumbo seat, and Sasha sat nicely in a high chair for the whole meal which is a first for her. After dinner, we decided to go for a stroll around the mall. As we exited the restaurant into the mall, I noticed she smelled funny but she had been really gassy so I assumed it was gas. Then as we walked down the mall, I casually happened to glance down as Sasha was squirming in my arms and Oh My God my sleeve was full of baby poo. I had some on my shirt and there was some on her cute little outfit. We quickly returned to the restaurant to use their restroom.
Needless to say, cleaning her up in one of those stupid baby changing tables at the restaurant was traumatic. Sasha always gets upset in foreign changing stations and screamed bloody murder the whole time she was in it. It was too high up for me to work comfortably and was over the toilet. The more I tried to clean her up, the more mess I made. I can not convey in words just how much of a mess it was. I wanted to just throw myself to the ground and cry but I knew that wouldn't accomplish anything so why bother. Cassie was so helpful. She fetched me paper towels and whatever I needed. At some point, I realized the situation required a trash bag so Cassie got a trash bag from the restaurant staff.
Sasha still seems to be mad at me for that whole incident. She cries if I try to change her diaper but she never liked it when I changed her diaper anyways. I try not to take it personal but it does sting a little. The first few times Dad changed her diaper she cried and I think that hurt his feelings, but she seems to be warming up so long as I am not in her sight. I do feel bad that she had such a bad experience but I don't know that I could have done any better than I did. I know in my heart I gave it the best I could.
Poor baby. Now I just have to get this fear out of my head that she is going to explode on me any time we leave the house with her. She's like a ticking pooping time bomb and I never know when she's going to go off or if I'll be prepared for the next explosion. I hope we don't have to go through this ever again.