Day

This week, Sasha has been on a day shift schedule. And I'm kind of happy about that this time. Because she's been mostly letting my husband sleep at night too.

I feel guilty working night shift some times. I feel like I'm making Sasha and my family miss out on a lot. Everything is open during the day, and that's when you can go out and do stuff or just see the world. But when you're awake at night, the only thing to do is stay in the apartment and try to stay very quiet so as not to annoy the neighbors too badly. Staying in an apartment and being quiet isn't necessarily the best for the intellectual growth of a baby. And so I feel bad.
But it had been nearly impossible for us to keep Sasha on a day shift with me on a night shift. She wanted to follow my schedule. It was easier on us if she did too. She could sleep with me and nurse on demand. And because she sleeps soundly with me, my husband can sleep too.
When we try to do a day shift with Sasha, that means that Sasha and my husband have to sleep while I'm at work. Sasha doesn't sleep so well without me. She tosses and turns. She wakes up and fusses. That keeps my husband awake and then he's exhausted by the time I get home from work. When I get home from work, I need to sleep so I can work again the next night, which means my husband has to continue to watch the baby during the day...he's supposed to be rested after all. But he's not and it leads to him getting himself so exhausted.
I hope that we can someday find a schedule that is healthy and works for everyone. A schedule that doesn't involve keeping the baby cooped up in our apartment watching infomercials all night. A schedule where she and my husband can go out to coffee shops or bookstores together, or maybe even *gasp* a park! Wouldn't that be something!
Maybe this is a "sleeping through the night" issue. I think most babies are already sleeping through the night by the time they are one. Maybe it's time we try to work on that with her.